Get Out Of Jail Free

You know those times in life where you spend too much time in or on something and you devote hours of your free time to creating or perfecting something and then all of a sudden it gets deleted or ruined? Well that happened to me this morning….. and I couldn’t be happier!

I got to work this morning and was doing my daily web searches, they go as follows:
Yahoo Mail, Yahoo Fantasy Sports, AZ Central Sports, ESPN, Craigslist, w00t, GMail, Techbargains, and finally and sadly…. MySpace.
I was going through the routine which generally takes about an hour or so out of my work schedule, and got to the point where I check myspace. I entered my signin info and here is what I was told:

The friend ID you entered has either been deleted by the user or by the host.

What!!???? You mean I got deleted…… SWEET!!!

No longer do I need to waste my time searching for friends or sending lame comments back and forth. I no longer have to hear some of the worst music known to man. Never again shall I spend endless hours looking at pictures of friends I just saw. No more web browsers crashing because the site is terrible, no more pictures of Richard Simmons telling me to have a gay day. I am officially free of the weight of Myspace, I feel like a whole new person. I feel like celebrating.

Thank you internet Gods for taking care of this problem for me, I don’t know if I could ever repay you.


NOTE: As soon as I was done typing up this post, I made one final stop to see if my profile was still deleted, and of course it wasn’t! Well back to being a slave…..

Enjoy You "Fortune" Cookie

Last night I had some Chinese food with my brother. It was a good meal, Jade Palace usually is, once we got our bill it was time to distribute the fortune cookies. Fortune cookies are called that because they contain a small piece of paper inside the cookie that has a short fortune for you. Over the past couple of years, the world has become more and more “PC” about what is written and just handed out. This has affected the fortune cookie world.

I open my fortune cookie last night and here is what I read:

“Be a good sport and you can’t fail!”

What!!?? How in the hell is that a fortune? You are telling me that we have become so “pc” insane that a fortune cookie is now just a saying. What happened to the good old days where your cookie said things like, “someone has a crush on you and will reveal it soon” or “you will be coming into some money soon” or even “don’t cross the street tomorrow or you will be hit by a van”. (I made that last one up, but I think clearly it would be the best fortune cookie ever.)

I guess my real problem is that we continue to call these things fortune cookies. If the waiter had said, “would you like your saying cookie?” I could have said no, and gone on with my night. But he didn’t, he delivered the fortune cookie with no warning that I was about to read something like “100 pennies = a dollar. Lucky numbers: 1, 11, 111.” I was not warned and wasted time reading the stupid thing and now I am wasting everyone’s time by writing about the stupid thing! All I want is to get a fortune cookie that actually has a stupid fortune in it.

I could write about this some more but it is time to leave work… See you later.

Thank You Sir May I Have Another

As promised here are some more pictures from the Guatemala trip along with some wonderful color commentary that is sure to land me a job announcing curling matches for fox next year.


That my friends is the volcano that exploded. unfortunetly it was last year and I was not within 5,000 miles of it. Some people have all the luck!


Palmercat Gal was so amazed that the kids in Guatemala have triangle shaped desks she couldnt take the picture in focus.


Most of our team stayed in local homes and ate breakfast with thier housing families. I, on the other hand, stayed in a hotel and had to wake up to this view every morning. The worse part of staying at the hotel was that I didnt get a chance to try the world famous Guatemalan gourmet breakfast "Mushy Pushy". Once again, some people have all the luck


Trees and water........ thats all I got.


Some people travel in style...... we traveled in a large van. Driven by a world famous driver named Danika Patrick.... Ohhh wait his name was Jugo. Sorry my bad.


Taxis in Guatemala consist of a pick-up truck, side railings and a wood beam. we managed to get 10 Gringos in one truck. we thought we had set a record when a "taxi" drive by carrying 47 Guatemalans. Man, they know how to pack! I wish the Palmercat Gal could take some lessons for her luggage.


Getting out of the Taxi's was alot harder than it looked.... now lets hug it out


One of these things is not like the other..... If you guessed Luis, the Guatemalan clown, you are correct.


This is a little game called Survivor. Unfortunetly for COCO she did not.


Or did she?


I'M THE KING OF THE........ BROKEBACK???? I mean who are these guys?


Here is the Arch de Triumph. Its just like the one in Paris, but not as girly.


Just going out to mow the lawn


White me can dance.... Oh wait, nope, they still cant.


Thats all for the pictures, enjoy them, set them as your desktop backround, print them out and sell them. Just make sure that you remember who loves you.

Ahhh Finally

It has been an amazing last couple of weeks. I spent this past week getting reaclimated to the USA and my job. I was in Guatemala from June 30th – July 10th. If you want details on what went down while I was in Guatemala check out our team blog

I thought I would post some pictures from my trip here for your viewing pleasure. So enjoy!



The Team


The Boys


The most wonderful Girl is in the middle and a nice valcano to boot!


This is how you dominate Guatemalans in basketball. they later showed us how to play soccer.


Yes Guatemala is absolutely beautiful.


This is what happens when the girls got bored of watching the world cup.... or was it one of our billion basketball games? I'm pretty sure it was from soccer.... anyways when girls get bored they get creative, when I get bored I just fart.


The road to Lake Atitlan. I thought it was just another bad movie sequel, but aparently it was just a dangerous poorly paved road in Guatemala.


Welcome to the Lake. I tried to get Sean Connery to record this for me, but he was unavailable.


Lake Atitlan, considered one of the most beautiful places in the world by some old explorer. Apparently he had never seen the Arizona Desert, now that is beautiful.


Ladies and gentleman, I am an actor!



Friends and Family, I give you COCO!



The human jungle Gym!


We worked with kids in the loacl town at different schools, it was quite eye opening.


I told you Guatemala was beautiful..... oh wait.... Yep it's still a third world country!

I will post more on monday, until then, have a great weekend and its great to be home.